nature weeps

Mother Nature’s
moodswings
as violent as my own

she is weeping
and wailing
her tears pour down
my window pane
her cries whistle
round the chimney

such confusion
it should be spring
but she is so cold
and alone
nothing makes sense
in this mixed up world

the gentle warmth
of spring sunshine
is forgotten
all she can give us
is sleet and snow
storms lashing
soaked
with passion
and despair

Ungagged

I wrapped a gag around my face tight
muzzled myself, to stop the words
trying to hold back the spillage
but the words bled out around the edges
trickling down my chin, and onto the page
blending with my tears of confusion
inner battles laid out like exhibits
for all to see and peer at
the shape of my heart pressed on the page
like the marks of childish painted hand prints
all spattered and gory with my blood
you’re looking at my anatomy, my internal organs
raw and sore, bruised and battered
and I can’t put it back in inside
I seek the soothing comfort of soft darkness
yet it eludes me so I hold to you
pulling out your entrails too so I can
inspect your scars and hurts and damage
poking and prying and questioning each dark line
demanding explanations, understanding sought
I want to see your heart exposed and dissect
its pumping chambers and arteries
I’m cold and afraid, trying to burrow in under your skin
become a part of you with words entwining
blotting out the terror and seeking warmth
what I am worth? how can I tell?
am I temptress? am I tender innocent?
I am needing to be needed, desired, required
to help you breathe, to hold you steady
as I begin to want and want and want
and the words spill out, stacked sentence on sentence
piling up upon eachother not stopping for breath
a blur of words unreadable now, just flowing
pouring like a waterfall of letters, twisting as they fall
I’m drowning in spilt words, pooling round me
and the wind begins to blow with frantic gusts
gasping, panting, lifting and begging for mercy